Self-doubt is an intrinsic part of creative work. This is how New York Comics get past it.

Being a Seattle Comic in New York is like being a guy with a cold in the hospital. It's like, "Oh... I should have been way more serious before I came here."

Last night, I had a sophomoric attack of consciousness. I thought to myself, "I'm in New York, dammit. I don't have to go to open mics every night. I should go to this party with my friends! Yeah! YEAH!"

No, no. Not at all. For example, at the party, I had a conversation with a girl who just quit her job the day before, and it wasn't even a good story. How do you fuck up the story of quitting your job?

To quell my guilt of not hitting any mics, I binge-listened to three episodes of the aformentioned Lets Talk About Sets podcast. I'm definitely coming up against my first psychological challenge when it comes to self-doubt, loneliness, and generally realizing how bad I am. This podcast is essential to overcoming that. Here's an exchange between co-host Jeff McBride and guest Usama Siddiquee (@usamabinlaughin):

USAMA: 90% of the time I want to do standup, and I'm happy to just do it. But it's that 10%, that's where I think the metal comes in. When you don't want to do it at all, are you going out? That's what makes a killer. 
JEFF: development occurs at the margin. The moment where you don't think you have any more to give- 
USAMA: YES. And you do that extra mic, you write that extra hour. That's what makes the guy whose not going to get beaten down. That's the guy who, when setbacks happen, you're still going. That's the main thing. When you go for it when there's zero love coming at you, and when there's almost hate coming at you? That's when you get good. That's the real shit.
*emphasis my own here

So, that's it. Anybody striving to make creative work has had this feeling, and an ethos like they describe is the antidote to it.

Thanks for reading, see ya' tomorrow!



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